One of the nice and surprising results of the "Shelter at Home" request, is that I have had more time for Self Care.
You're right, this is an old photo!  No wandering the trails of Sorrento for me right now.  Nope!  Staying home...

But one of the delightful hidden benefits of this time, is I am giving to myself more. 
Before it seemed I never had enough "extra" time to meditate! 
Of course I know that's not actually true. 
We have all the time in the world we need to do the things that matter most to us.
It is more a matter of priority.  Time Management.  Organization.

Well, the Lockdown has been my royal excuse to spend more time in meditation.

For Alexander students (me included) that means starting with a straight spine and noticing my breathing.  Sometimes I sit on a yoga block with my legs crossed into half lotus position, and other times I just sit on my cozy overstuffed chair with my legs pulled up.  The spine still stays straight, but it is more comfortable, and that is my goal; relaxation, meditation, and being in a mindful state for period of between 10-20 minutes.

There is no "right" or formal way to meditate.  Mostly we are bringing awareness to the body, and allowing the mind to relax so that our attention can go within.  This intention is often the only thing you need to bring to your practice, that and looking for ease.

This is one of the great teachings of the Alexander Technique too, looking for ease in the body/mind.  And maybe I would add "Breath".  We are breathing, living beings with tremendous capacity for awareness and expansion.  Some call this the field of consciousness.  Yes.  But meditation can also be simple, with no plans and no agenda.  

So I like to start just noticing my ease.  How are the shoulders doing?  Can I let go of my belly a little bit more?  Is there any tension in the legs?  Where do I feel ease in this moment?  Can I let go of my tongue, my jaw?  Where do I feel the body pressing into the chair or block?  Let the mind and body sink down, make a connection to the ground.

Then to begin to follow the breath in and out, sensing the rising and falling of the ribs, feeling the relaxation of the shoulders and belly. Deep breath in and deep breath out.  Eyes open, face creating a gentle inner smile.  Breathe...
                                                                                                                     "AH".  

Now to close the eyes, and notice the breath.  Bring the mind there, and if the mind wanders off, gently bring it back to the breath.  If the mind wanders off, which it will, bring it back again.

Let some time go by, count the breaths 1 through 10 and back to one again, if that feels good, otherwise, just notice the breathing in and out.  Let things be.  Keep going for awhile, and when you are ready, start to come out of the meditation by noticing the sounds around you, then noticing the body once again pressing against the surface you are on, and when you are ready, just open your eyes and go about your day.  

A moment of ease, noticing this, sometimes is all it takes to shift your emotional energy and bring you to a better state of optimism and health.  

​-Diane

Let's take a look at month number two of the New Year.  Remember January 1st?  I do.  I particularly remember how fresh and new the year seemed, and like many others, I created my list of "Resolutions"  for the year.  It felt, and was for me particularly refreshing this year.
Those of you who know me and my work (especially the Alexander Technique) know that I talk about habitual patterns, and how to overcome them, for a freer, happier body and mind.
Have you gone back to some habits that you wanted to say goodbye to?
U-huh.  Me too.
I could share that the habits I most struggle with in my own life are the things I DON'T do.
1) Because I don't feel that I have the time
2) That I don't honor my own self care enough to make the time for
3) That I talk myself out of for being not important enough
Things like meditating regularly and playing the piano.  Who has time for all that!
But guess what.  I regretfully believe that these are not in the realm of procrastination after all.  You see, I believe that the gentle art of not procrastinating is better placed in the category of self care.
In other words, it is more a matter of priorities.  The new year reminds me that time is of the essence, and "resolutions" are about what we want to bring more of.  Of what we want to FEEL.
More joy.  More lightness.  More ease.
All of the things I teach my clients.
Let's call this "How to have a happy life"
So...the first step to making change is to assess where you are. From there you can put some loving focus on what you want and where you want to point to. SO THAT you can plan and take action on what is in alignment with your desires. This is true for every area of your life be it your home, health or happiness. One of the biggest obstacles to creating the life you love is the tendency to procrastinate. 
Procrastination can turn your wishes and desires into a VERY STUCK CONDITION that leaves you feeling trapped and unable to move forward. 
Here are a few ideas for getting some momentum on your dreams and plans...


First, Realize that we are very habituated creatures.  Although it is difficult to measure objectively, I would say that up to 90% of our day is lived on automatic, with just a few inspired thoughts and ideas sprinkled in that make us think  "gee, wouldn't it be nice if I could (fill in the blank). 
 These habits are ingrained and become the patterns that become our actual accounting of our time.  When procrastination surfaces it is because your desires have been taken over by your habitual, automatic behavior. The first step to removing this  mode is gaining the awareness that it is happening (again) and that you could actually make a new and better choice for your well being.


Next, start to take back control of your desires and put in place little time capsules where you can do the things you say you want to do, in my case meditate and play the piano.  You will have to create some kind of time or space system that can hold the doing of it.
For me, meditating first thing in the morning is best, so I can create a time and space container for it.  Before I read or get ready for clients.  Before breakfast even.  For you it could be right before bed.  The most important thing is to be consistent. In other words, to create a container for your goals.
You could spend some time first just deciding what you want to bring in more of, so that it doesn't get lost in the myriad of other important things in your day...but remember, because we operate on automatic so much, you may be fooling yourself about all of the time constraints, and in fact, you are simply not making enough time for what is important to you.
What is your big vision?  What are the most important things on your list?  Write that list first, and then look for the hierarchy of most valuable and important.  Put those things on the top of your list.  This includes home, health AND well being.  
Now you can create a container to hold the habits that would help you manifest.  My suggestion is that you start with just 10-20 minutes a day doing these things you love.  But do them consistently and no matter what. Ask yourself how you can move towards these goals with ease and grace. Create a container that will help to amplify this habit in your life. For example, if you decide you want to be more organized, take small steps to clear clutter and organize specific areas. Decide on a specific time each day (one that is convenient for you) to begin to implement your new activity. Do this task at the same time each day. This will help you form a positive, life-affirming habit that will help you put your ideal vision on the fast track of success.


Lastly, celebrate that you have brought conscious presence to your desire.  See the effects of your conscious attention and intention.
This builds awareness and creates new patterns, in the form of BETTER habits that will go a long way toward measuring the joy and satisfaction of a life well lived.  YOU in the driver's seat of your life, instead of feeling like you are just running around putting out fires all the time.
So what do you want to create more of in your life this year?  It's not too late to begin anew... 
Remember, there is an art in not procrastinating, and it starts with what you really desire, and what you value.
 

Do you ever feel like you have blinders on?  There is a saying that we are always "getting in our own way" and sometimes I have a real understanding of what that means.  

Our habits are the problem.  And moving toward conscious change requires nothing more than awareness.  

So the GAP:  Literally, this is the space on the subway platform between you and the subway car you want to get on.  Often the voice comes over the loudspeakers to "mind the gap".  Good advise really!  We don't want to fall into the gap as the doors are closing.

In Alexander Technique terms, the GAP is a metaphor for the space between.  This is in fact the most creative space that you have available to you, in order to avoid falling into the same habits and patterns and behaviors as before.  

The habit is your default.  It could be your anxiety, your negative thoughts, your habitual movement into the chair that keeps your back tight and your shoulders creeping up to your ears, in other words the rote ways of doing things that keep you stuck and not being free.

Because isn't what we really want just basic freedom?  Freedom to move beautifully like we did as little children, free to be spontaneous, and not worry about falling?

 Free is the opposite of STUCK.

So how  can we get UNSTUCK? First and foremost, you have to  notice what is actually in front of you.  Wake up to the present environment.  See the options available to you.  DO you want to make the same choice as  before?  Where has it gotten you?  What would you want instead?  What would be different if, through new awareness, you pause in that moment of the GAP and re-direct yourself to a  different  outcome?

In AT, we are always bringing conscious awareness to the body/mind, and then possibly making a new and better choice for how to move.

The same applies to our emotional and mental choices.  In fact, the physical and the emotional/mental realms are the same.  As you can "mind the GAP" mentally, there will be a definite change to your physical well being.  No question.  

So let's use an example...

The train is coming, and you are late.  So you are thinking about the place you have to get to, and when you and everyone else steps onto the train, you forget to look down, and fall into the GAP.  OUCH.  Now, let's go back to that moment again.  The train in coming and you PAUSE for a moment and notice the space between the platform and the train, and see that it is a little bigger than normal.  You direct yourself upward, shift onto the standing leg and bend your other hip, knee and ankle, landing gracefully on the foot and the rest is easy.  You go to your seat and continue in your reverie.

Such a rote exercise that we do every day, right?  (Or maybe you have to get into your car instead, so vary the metaphor for our purposes here).  Your awareness in that moment is everything.  It is the difference between ease and injury.  It is the difference, in the long run, in keeping your body/mind fluid and free.  It brings a youthful energy into your life, as you bring awareness to what is right in front of you.

We are confronted by these moments all day, every day.  The GAP is the pause between, when you simply bring all of yourself to the present moment, and allow your consciousness to expand.  to take in the whole of your environment, so that you can be present to your life in a holistic way.

In fact, it is really the little things that bring beauty and freedom back to you.  It is a practice of awareness that you can choose to do, gathering more and more elements for a life well lived each and every day.

Now, as the holidays are approaching, think about how you can use the GAP to keep the stress down, and the enjoyment high.  I think of self awareness as and art.  You deserve all this beauty in your life!

Do you remember the phrase, "Don't step on a crack or you will break your Mother's back?"  Ouch.  We thought that was the funniest thing ever.  Or, I should say, as children we loved skipping over cracks and dancing our way through the neighborhood with this little self-made rule for ourselves.

What did that teach?  Rhythm, control of the body, eye-foot co-ordination (or in scientific parlance, eye-hand co-ordination), breath, freedom...you get the picture.

So what happens over time?  Why do we stop skipping and start second-guessing our balance, movement and control?

Ah, now that is a big question.  Why do we stop TRUSTING ourselves to maintain balance and freedom of movement in our daily lives?

Well, some of the answer is that we develop habits based on fear of falling.  We tighten just a little when insecure, and we stop the elegant balance in gravity that the human body-mind system has available to us.  Over time (decades) this becomes normal.  We start to pull down and pull in.

But what if when meeting a stimulus, perhaps an uneven surface in the concrete, or a step up or down, instead we paused for just a moment and thought "stay free in my neck and release my head upward" instead of pulling down.  This is called "Direction" in the Alexander Technique.  

Then possibly notice the ability of freeing my breathing so that I don't hold my breath in anticipation of falling, and releasing instead into expansion.  Hmmm.  That sounds like a tall order!

But it isn't really.  It allows us to pause in the moment of the stimulus and do something different from what we usually do, which is to compress and tighten our muscles, and lose that inherent freedom that we are designed for.

Yes, humans are designed for free, upright movement, but a lifetime of tension has left us tight, held and not breathing!  We don't see children or animals move that way.  They LOVE to skip and dance and play.  They love to jump too!  When was the last time you jumped just for the sheer pleasure of it?

The Alexander Technique is a mindful approach to change that will give you clues as to how to skip over a gap, a bump in the road, a rock, and think nothing of it.  

More on the GAP in my next newsletter...I want to share what the psychological gap means, and how we can navigate it with ease.

​How many times have you heard that before?  Begin again.  These are precious words for me, because it is so darn easy to get caught up in our heads about things.  Especially at the beginning of a New Year, there are seemingly countless New Year's plans and resolutions.  You would think that everyone in my inbox has stepped up into the light, and proclaimed their plan.

Not me, this year.  I am realizing that what I have been spending my interior life thinking about, is actually letting go. Letting some expectation of myself go.   Letting some people go, who I clearly cannot help, in particular a family member who is in deep pain right now, and another one who has purposely removed herself from our extended family.  These two people have occupied way too much of my interior head space in 2017, and now that it's a new year, I think I can let them go.  (They will come back of their own accord, if it is in their best interest to do so and if they want my support.  Letting them go represents an understanding in me that recognizes simply that I can't bring them to a place they cannot come to yet).

I am also letting go of some previously held ideas of what "success" means.  I want to conduct my business in a deeper way, a way that gives of the resources I have in a more full, playful, rich way.  And I am letting go of structures that I thought were supportive of myself and my business.  Structures that have me in "learning" or "seeking" mode instead of teaching/speaking mode.

This last thought came from reading a note from a facebook friend, who wanted me to buy a product from someone she called her new "guru" for 2018.  I sat there and asked myself why I would want to pursue yet another "guru" at this time.  And you know what?  This represents a shift in my being.  No more "bright shiny objects" at least for now.  I feel that I am integrating the teachings of F.M.Alexander even more in my life, by listening within, by noticing what comes up, and working with it.  Coming present, standing present, breathing present, and beginning again from right here.  

In other words, things are freeing themselves from my habit of creating self-imposed criteria, where I have in the past felt that I don't know enough yet, so have to buy that one more product, or take that one more class before I am "ready".  Ready for what?  You see, the whole thing represents the fallacy of arrival.  We feel that we have arrived only when we are 100% sure that we know everything.  Crazy, right?

I'm talking about the "seeker" mode.  Seeker mode keeps us ever hungry for more.  It keeps us from feeling complete.  Seeker mode is similar to "perfection" mode, by the way.  Perfection mode is an attitude of not enough-ness, where BECAUSE it isn't quite perfect, we can't share our knowledge.  Otherwise...what?  Otherwise we will be judged and then REJECTED.  

The sense of rejection is deep, and very real for people.  Especially women in business who need to be seen and visible in their businesses. This is the number one place where they get stuck.  It will show up in the form of procrastinating making that important phone call, or sharing their knowledge.  It is a question of worthiness. then it shows up as not taking a stand for themselves, not asking for the sale, or participating fully.

The Alexander Technique is a tool to come present to ourselves in the present moment, and just be.  Not to judge, or to need a "guru" or try to be perfect.  Just to come present and begin again right here, right now.  The tool is based on a discovery...that when we leave ourselves alone, the right thing does itself.  There is quite literally nothing to do.

So, let's imagine ourselves in a networking meeting.  Nothing to "do" right?  Just being and breathing.  And listening, and responding.  Connecting.  Feel good?  It should!

So this is what I am suggesting...let's be our own "gurus" starting today.  Start here in this place and awaken to what is right here.  What are you noticing?  Are you breathing? How do you feel?  Tired?  Free?  Tense?  OK!  Now feel your feet on the ground, make one little decision right now about what you want.  And let it take you somewhere...

Hopefully into the freest, most creative opening that you have felt in a long time.  A New Year just to be more yourself, more connected, more free.

Yipee! 

I had the strangest beginning of the New Year.  I wanted to stay in bed and pull the covers over my head!  Not on the first day; I was full of enthusiasm and play, enjoyed the fireworks that I can literally see on my roof deck in Philadelphia, I had made my traditional chocolate mousse and had the bottle of champagne cooling...all was fine to start.  I am talking about the next few days when I should have been creating my 90 day action plan and getting started on the creative part of  my business.

Those of you who know me will agree that this is not a typical response to change for me.  I am usually the energizer bunny with more than enough ideas to keep my passions in motion, and if anything, I am usually going a thousand miles an hour with five plates all in the air at the same time.

But this week was different; I didn't feel like doing anything! I decided to listen to my body and process what was going on with me.

So the first intuitive answer I got was that I am not aligned with my projects and ventures at the moment.  There is something more on the interior that is going on.  In the energy management tools I offer all of my coaching clients, I call this the inner energy management or mindset work, which helps to clear what is in the way to the full expression and manifestation of our work in the world.  So wanting to stay asleep is a big clue!!

Here is what I learned about my inner processes this week:

• Sometimes when there is an energy drain, there is a hidden psychological issue that has not bubbled up to the surface yet.  When I asked my inner guidance what that could be, the obvious answer presented itself...my brother is going in for serious heart surgery on Wednesday.  I am worried about him.
• There is a drive we all have that includes a list of "shoulds".  The New Year is replete with resolutions, and I am definitely feeling the pressure of the collective American obsession with changing ourselves, and improving ourselves at this time of year!  Maybe I don't have to be all that productive just now.
• Not feeling aligned with a particular project is fine.  There are often a number of pieces to put into place in the creation of a new project or idea, and I am right in the middle of mine.  I am at the end of editing my book, "Step Up and SHINE; power and presence in action", have already found a great graphic artist to make the book cover, and am really close to sending it out to be edited by a professional editor.  So yea!  Now the looming next steps are the unknowns about how to publish, create a launch, etc.  I am not versed in the publishing world at all, and so this is probably where my biggest inner alignment has to find some balance...

The good news is that as I do the necessary inner work to find my breath and ease while finding my way in the project, I am sure I will  be ready to pop my head back out of the covers and commence with my New Year's goals.  Even writing it out to my dear newsletter/blog friends is a good start!


So if you are dragging your feet about your resolutions, whether they be to lose that extra five pounds you always wanted to do (remember I work at a gym, and it cracks me up how many new people I see there in the first week of January.  Wonder if they will still be there on February 1?)
I wish you deep cleansing breaths and time to process whatever your big New Year's wishes are for yourself.  I am here cheering you on all the way! And if you ARE at the gym, good for you!  Keep it up with balance and discipline and I know you will be feeling better, slimmer and more svelt.  Isn't that a great word, svelt?  Let's all be svelt this year!

In these lazy, hazy days of summer, do you have some best practices that you do to  maintain your free movement and also enhance your knowledge of the body/mind connection so that you are creating positive changes in your freedom of movement, breath and balance?
I don't know about your summer, but things do slow down a bit for me in august,  and I have more time to reflect and to make choices about how I want to spend my day.

So often when I work with clients, I hear from them that they can't seem to slow down and take time to take care of themselves.  One of the fundamental teachings of the Alexander Technique is to become aware and conscious of our movement choices and the BEST way to become more aware is to get conscious and notice the way we are moving.  

Usually we don't choose; we just move.  And usually mindlessly! What happens when you make it a "practice" TO SLOW DOWN and notice how you are doing the movement activity?  It feels GOOD!  

It is facinating to me that during the actual Alexander Technique lesson we slow down so much, that we can experience a totally different movement progression, say in walking or reaching up for a teacup on a high shelf.  By practicing the activity with more awareness all kinds of things start revealing themsleves...we notice that our shoulders have become tense, our necks get tight, our breathing becomes restricted...why when we do the activity with awareness and the "fingertips leading the arm" does the activity become easier while actually be successful in continuing to breathe?

This is the way the person is designed to move, with awareness and co-ordination, and directing ourselves into free movement.

We say in the Alexander Technique that awareness is the first step. If you aren't aware of your movment choice, you are not choosing, but instead you are letting your habits take over.

Of course some habits are fine; we shouldn't have to think about walking every time we have to go somewhere!  But paying attention to the amount of unnecessary tension in our walking, and then having a process in which to reduce that tension, well that's what feels so different and so good!

Whenever I start with a new student, I give them the "doorknob" exercise" to do at home.  That is, to pause just as they are about to open a door, and notice the excess tension in their necks and shoulders, and see if they can reduce the tension before opening the door.

this exercise works so well, because just like the many times we sit and stand in a day, we are often opeing doors in a day.  Each time we do it, we can employ the practice of pausing, directing ourselves into length and width, and freeing our breath!  Like a refreshing summer rain...

have a lovely August, friends and students!  Hopefully I will see you really soon, butr meanwhile, enjoy a simple "best practice" and see if it makes your day go a little better!

Sincerely,

Diane

Diane L. Sussman is a Nationally Certified Teacher of the Alexander Technique who has been serving clients for more than 25 years.  She is an expert in movement co-ordination, and brings her enthusiasm for wellness, free movement and poise into the lives of her students throughout the country.

Also an Energy Healer and Body Transformation Coach, Diane would be happy to answer questions you may have about next steps for your future embodiment of health and well being!  (215) 563-1271