Not me, this year. I am realizing that what I have been spending my interior life thinking about, is actually letting go. Letting some expectation of myself go. Letting some people go, who I clearly cannot help, in particular a family member who is in deep pain right now, and another one who has purposely removed herself from our extended family. These two people have occupied way too much of my interior head space in 2017, and now that it's a new year, I think I can let them go. (They will come back of their own accord, if it is in their best interest to do so and if they want my support. Letting them go represents an understanding in me that recognizes simply that I can't bring them to a place they cannot come to yet).
I am also letting go of some previously held ideas of what "success" means. I want to conduct my business in a deeper way, a way that gives of the resources I have in a more full, playful, rich way. And I am letting go of structures that I thought were supportive of myself and my business. Structures that have me in "learning" or "seeking" mode instead of teaching/speaking mode.
This last thought came from reading a note from a facebook friend, who wanted me to buy a product from someone she called her new "guru" for 2018. I sat there and asked myself why I would want to pursue yet another "guru" at this time. And you know what? This represents a shift in my being. No more "bright shiny objects" at least for now. I feel that I am integrating the teachings of F.M.Alexander even more in my life, by listening within, by noticing what comes up, and working with it. Coming present, standing present, breathing present, and beginning again from right here.
In other words, things are freeing themselves from my habit of creating self-imposed criteria, where I have in the past felt that I don't know enough yet, so have to buy that one more product, or take that one more class before I am "ready". Ready for what? You see, the whole thing represents the fallacy of arrival. We feel that we have arrived only when we are 100% sure that we know everything. Crazy, right?
I'm talking about the "seeker" mode. Seeker mode keeps us ever hungry for more. It keeps us from feeling complete. Seeker mode is similar to "perfection" mode, by the way. Perfection mode is an attitude of not enough-ness, where BECAUSE it isn't quite perfect, we can't share our knowledge. Otherwise...what? Otherwise we will be judged and then REJECTED.
The sense of rejection is deep, and very real for people. Especially women in business who need to be seen and visible in their businesses. This is the number one place where they get stuck. It will show up in the form of procrastinating making that important phone call, or sharing their knowledge. It is a question of worthiness. then it shows up as not taking a stand for themselves, not asking for the sale, or participating fully.
The Alexander Technique is a tool to come present to ourselves in the present moment, and just be. Not to judge, or to need a "guru" or try to be perfect. Just to come present and begin again right here, right now. The tool is based on a discovery...that when we leave ourselves alone, the right thing does itself. There is quite literally nothing to do.
So, let's imagine ourselves in a networking meeting. Nothing to "do" right? Just being and breathing. And listening, and responding. Connecting. Feel good? It should!
So this is what I am suggesting...let's be our own "gurus" starting today. Start here in this place and awaken to what is right here. What are you noticing? Are you breathing? How do you feel? Tired? Free? Tense? OK! Now feel your feet on the ground, make one little decision right now about what you want. And let it take you somewhere...
Hopefully into the freest, most creative opening that you have felt in a long time. A New Year just to be more yourself, more connected, more free.